Hello dear ones,
Today we meet the second “Immeasurable” of the Brahma Viharas: Compassion.
These days we may find ourselves turning away or shutting down from the pain and disappointments of life. It is distressing to see the homeless, the refugees, those suffering from floods and fires and famine.
But in our hearts we know that to turn away is more painful than to face the unfathomable and unacceptable.
What are we to do?
Last January, when we traveled to St John for our first 7-Day Mindfulness & Yoga Retreat in recent years, a lovely 82-year-old man signed up to come along, by himself.
A few years back his daughter had brought him with her to take a Mindfulness series, so I knew him from our Zoom encounters.
I did not know that among multiple other long-term neurological effects, he suffers significant balance challenges as a result of exposure to Agent Orange during his military service in the Vietnam War.
Shortly before the retreat I thought to inquire about his ease on steps—our lodging at Concordia on St John is known for long wooden staircases spilling down the slopes to the ocean.
He replied, “Better to have no stairs.”
Yikes!
How would we make this work?
When Thom arrived off the ferry I saw him pushing a rolling walker, the kind with a seat.
My heart sank: How would we manage?
Then I saw his spirit; his big grin and sparkling eyes. He grabbed his walker, threw it in the back of the car, put his arm crutches on, and made his way into the car.
Over the week of the retreat, Thom made his way: not just down the 72 (72!) steps for yoga, and across the beach to lurch himself into the water—but into our hearts with his grace and gratitude and dignity.
Compassion was kindled in each of us. Not pity, not contrived sympathy, not separateness, but compassion: the face of love that says: “I know. Me too. I’m here.”
When offering compassion, there is no need to take on others’ suffering as our own, which will fatigue and overwhelm us—we are most effective when we can simply be with suffering: respond mindfully to it; acknowledge that we, too, know it; and meet it where it is.
In our words and in our actions, we can offer the 2nd face of love to all beings.
“I will always remember the 72 steps and how you made that journey an opportunity…”